Going out with your new bundle of joy? The chances are that Mum is exhausted and needs a break. I know that you’re doing plenty too, but she’ll really, really appreciate some quiet time.

It’s a scary, but amazing. You’re outside with your very own child. You’re doing it. You’re a father and you’re nailing it!

There will be many, many moments of dread and horror as we contemplate the very worst that could happen.

What if someone sneezes on your baby and gives it the plague? Someone could breath on it, you might be attacked by a bear and have to save both yourself and your defenceless child, or have you considered earthquakes?

More likely, though I’m not ruling out the bear attack, is that your darling miniature human will be smelly, hungry, or tired.

So, here are the 3 Things you’re going to need before leaving the house.

1. Diapers. If the worst, and smelliest of poops come, and it will, you need to have wipes, diaper cream (I use the Zincofax Cream Extra Strength), a few spare diapers and some small plastic bags to put it all in a neat package for the trash. The mini Playtex Diaper Genie Portable Diaper Bag Dispenser is awesome, but you could just as well use those Dog Poo Bags.

2. Food. Plan baby’s meals. Will they be expecting milk or formula anytime soon? Bring whatever they’re going to need to satiate their hunger, and bring extra in case you’re delayed. These Munchkin Two Snack Catchers are really good once your baby is picking up food by themselves. It stops (most of) the mess and you can just throw it in your bag for an emergency snack.

3. Baby’s sleep toy. My daughter loves her ‘Breathable Lovey’ cat and it really helps her to settle for a nap. She has 7 of them in case some are lost to laundry mishaps or ferral animals. Look for an organic cotton option if you can. It just gives me a little more peace of mind knowing that she’s not rubbing anything toxic on her face. Also, check that it’s breathable! This aden + anais Organic Lovey Elephant looks like a popular one, from a really great brand.

Ok, you’re all set. Now brace yourself for all the “awws” and “can I touch her/himself?” that you can handle, and then more. Many, many more.