Let me just say, that these are tips based on my own experiences as a new Dad. They won’t work for everyone, but hey might work for you.

If you’re also a Dad, then please add your tips, tricks, and valuable advice in the comments below. I’ve got a lot to learn!

Here we go:

1. Bring a pillow to the hospital. If you’re staying overnight, the nurses only look after the Mum.
2. You’re going to see and smell terrible, terrible things. The first few baby poos are like tar (I’ve heard Vaseline helps).
3. Sleep when your baby sleeps – or try to nap between making sure your baby is still breathing.
4. Everyone, I mean every single person will ask – how old is she/he? And What’s his/her name? Just smile and answer them.
5. Old people and strangers will try and touch your precious new, and temporarily clean baby. Feel free to politely decline. “Oh she’s a bit I’ll, best not to give you anything.”
6. After 4 months, look up ‘Sleep Training’ and get through 3 days. It’ll change your world.
7. Look after yourself. Lift weights to train for holding an increasingly heavy human for long periods.
8. Take turns. You’re in this together, so while she sleeps, you’re up. That includes through the night.
9. As soon as you’re able to leave the baby for a few hours with someone you trust, go on a short date. Even just for a coffee with your partner.
10. Get a tough phone case. Your baby will want to play with it, bite it, drop it and smash it.

Bonus: 11. The baby will cry and scream in public, especially on the bus, train or plane. Most parents will sympathise and be fine with it. Don’t spare a thought for anyone who isn’t. They’ll get over it shortly after your baby does.